The Role of Purpose and Meaning in Motivation
Kairos is a Greek word that translates to "the right time." This concept posits that there exists a moment in time, specific to each individual, where their personal "paradox of choice" is most likely to occur. For example, one might be so hungry for the "right time", or lack thereof, that they have an overwhelming urge to cook. Or they might feel like their life has been spinning out of control and the only way out would be for them to just take leave. Each individual has their own "rightness of choice" or point in time where it would make sense for them to act on whatever it is they desire most at the moment. However, when we find ourselves in the present moment, we have the opportunity to think about how our lives are unfolding and what it would mean if we did make a particular decision.
The idea of "meaning" is perhaps one of the most compelling ideas that drives us to make choices, even when they don't seem too appealing. Meaning implies that there is something significant about our present experience, no matter how small or insignificant it might seem to be at times. Often times meaning is derived from trying to make the best out of situations where we feel like things could be worse (meaning: better). For instance, imagine you are in a foreign country and you're not sure how much longer your passport will last. The only way you can achieve the meaning that you need out of that experience is to leave and get it renewed in your home country. If you were to stay in the country, maybe there would be an opportunity to learn a new language or discover something else about the culture. In these cases meaning arises through our ability to generate creative solutions in response to circumstances that are not always pleasant.
I think the concept of purpose is generally more specific than meaning, but I will include them both as one coherent idea here because I find them both useful and empowering. Purpose is similar to meaning but rather than being generalized, purpose often refers specifically to something we are after (meaning:achieving). The purpose of the trip abroad mentioned above could be to get my passport renewed and not to learn a new language or discover something about the culture. The difference between meaning and purpose is that meaning always implies some kind of personal benefit whereas purpose can be pursued for the benefit of another. So you might say, "I am applying for a job in order to have a meaningful life." Who cares? As long as the job is meaningful! There will always be more opportunities to fulfill your own purposes as long as you continue investing your time and energy into meaningful activities. Without purpose there is no drive to invest.
The key to unlocking the true role of purpose and meaning in motivation, I think, is remembering that we are continually projecting ourselves into the future. The way we want things to turn out and how we believe they will impact our lives should be considered when making choices. This isn't about wearing rose colored glasses or trying to see the glass as half full, but rather about thinking about what it would mean if one thing was happen instead of another thing. One could argue that this "what if" scenario-building is what motivates us in the first place, by providing us with a vision of a better future and wish for us to actualize it (meaning: create). From a motivational standpoint, this is the relationship between meaning and purpose. In sum, meaning provides the foundation for purpose. Purpose then provides the motivation to make decisions that are consistent with our meaning-seeking desires and will help us actualize them (meaning: create).
All of this boils down to one statement: we all have the power to create our own lives. What do I mean by that? My definition of an existential statement likely sounds quite familiar to you though I might have embellished upon it in regards to its role in motivation. Existential means that there are choices available to us. Moreover, I assert that we all have the ability to choose how we want our lives to unfold. If you take care of your mind and body through proper diet, exercise, sleep and medication if necessary then your choices will be more meaningful and purposeful.
(Easy, right?)
The last time I was in The Big Apple was December 2013. I visited my dad who had recently been in an auto accident which resulted in him breaking his ankle and leg among other serious injuries (he's fine now). Due to his recovery time he was unable to drive me around the city as he always does on my visits. I also had the task of finding a job (I was looking for an internship and then as a full time writer) and was living in Brooklyn at the time.
I decided to stay with my dad during the week where I would go out to eat with him every night. He lives on Long Island Sound in a secluded community where he has his own home with its own pool and garage with car and motorcycle garages. It's really nice, but sometimes I feel that it can be isolating while I'm in New York City (one of the big reasons why I moved back to Arizona).
During one of my visits I remember telling my dad that I was continuing to think about jobs and that at this point in time I thought it might make a lot of sense for me to stay in New York and work from home (as his office is on the 1st floor of his house) during the day. My dad was very skeptical about this because he thought it was too much of a hassle. "Why would you want to do that?" he asked, "You have your own place." So it would have meant driving an hour every morning to his office, dropping my things off there, going back into Brooklyn, coming back to Long Island Sound for dinner and returning after before heading back out again. And then driving back to Brooklyn in the evening (before going back out to Long Island Sound again). This may seem reasonable, and at the time it seemed reasonable to me. Why wouldn't this work?
I'm not sure what I was thinking. Things were happening so fast at this point, I guess I wasn't really thinking in terms of long term sustainability. Sometimes we need to take a step back and ask ourselves some questions: "why am I choosing this?" "where does this path ultimately lead me?" and "how do my actions today fit into my long-term goals?"
When you have the chance to do something truly meaningful with your life you should do it.
Conclusion: I understand that the choices my dad made and had to make were out of his own volition. Like I said, it's not about blame, but rather making sure you are thinking about your life and where you want to go with it. Because if you aren't thinking about it then someone else is; someone who isn't as invested in your best interests as you are. There are a lot of great things going on in my life right now and I am very happy. But there was a point between graduating from Arizona State University and becoming the author of this blog that seemed like a very long time to be unemployed, particularly for post-college graduates (my age).